Here

In Manila, I spend an inordinate amount of time around copy machines.

In the cheap hotel, I peel an apple with a Swiss knife.

In my childhood bedroom, I weep over an unpresentable pincushion made for sewing class.

In Bali, I am too embarrassed to say no to a manicure.

In Makati, I take off my heels and slip into flats.

In the coffee shop, I write the incriminating postcard.

In the ballet studio, I am amused by my catastrophic pirouettes.

In Chicago, I attempt to mimic an old roommate’s unidentifiable accent.

In Bangkok, I am addressed in Chinese.

In the computer room, I read the signs.

In the government office, I apologize for the errors on the form.

In Bellagio, I am mistaken for the writing resident’s companion.

In the arctic conference room, I am intrigued by the red telephone.

In Los Angeles, I am thought to be Mexican.

In the elevator, I smile at the child drooling in its stroller.

In Rome, I am unfazed by the transport strike.

In Palawan, I take my lunch with a bottle of cerveza.

In the rickety cable car, I admit to my unforgivable condescension.

In Singapore, I think of Cubao in June.

In Venice, I watch a poodle sashay toward an ice cream shop.

In the library, I hunt in sequence, from PN to PQ to PR.

In my office, I am annoyed by privilege on display in texts about travel.

In Boracay, I try to appreciate the Victorian wallpaper.

In the taxi, I am asked an unnerving question.

In Mandaluyong, I admire a strongly worded memo.

In Sendai, I distract myself by painting flowers on a handkerchief.

In Brisbane, I am thrilled to spot an actor whose movies I abhor.

In the theater, I am envious of the protagonist’s impeccable posture.

In New York City, I procrastinate.

In church, I calculate the costs of moving to a bigger apartment.

In the balcony, I doze during a mellow card game.

In Dumaguete, I affectionately decline phone sex at two in the morning.

In the clinic, I am pressured by the clerk to hyphenate.

In Florence, I lose a coat.

In the allegedly ghost-ridden hallway, I am hungry after making out.

In Binondo, I reject my companion’s dining choices.

In Paris, I purchase tokens for a five-minute shower.

In Amsterdam, I am seized by an uncharacteristic confusion over left and right.

In Cleveland, I excuse myself from the exasperating religious debate over dinner.

In Tokyo, I am asked to produce too many identification cards to have my money changed.

In the hole in the wall, I wear my interlocutor’s sunglasses.

In Cubao, I call into question the sparseness of my wardrobe.

In the supermarket, I comfort myself in the aisle devoted to cleaning agents.

In Baguio, I eat a macaroon.

In Antipolo, I learn to make a rosary, a macramé belt, and a hand-sewn apron.

In Pittsburgh, I adopt a cat.

In the waiting room, I judge the painting on the wall.

In the bungalow by the beach, I indulge in the delusion of a miniature herb garden.

In Davao, I despair over the malfunctioning keycard.

In Los Baños, I am told to keep my voice down.

Malapit Na!

Basahin ang ilang akda dito.

A Year of Walking, 2

Walked fifteen minutes tops today. Thought it would do my start-of-term nerves good if I got out of my pajamas and ambled to the public library, or closer, the coffee shop, or even just down the road. Slipped on the steps outside the door–managed to keep my balance but not the last bit of positive energy I had left in me. There was snow and there was rain and it was wet and it was cold. Felt claustrophobic under all the layers of clothing. Turned back. Back in my pajamas with this song in my head and I’m counting the days until I get to Palawan in June, Palawan in June, Palawan in June.

if I could only walk out on winter

A Year of Walking, 1

Walked five hours today. Took advantage of the unseasonably warm weather. All the dogs were out walking too–bug-eyed and leashed and sweatered and shivering small ones–none of the more lovable, heftier breeds. By the fountain there were lusty lip locks left and right: apparently, standing beside a fountain triggers such behavior. At the playground there were kids dangling from monkey bars. Sat beside a statue of a man reading one of his tales to a statue of a duck. Developed a momentary interest in the various makes and mechanisms of child strollers. Got up, walked on, and many blocks later entered a building where, twelve floors up, saw a tiny exhibit–bold-colored drawings of domestic interiors/exteriors, a tray adorned with cherub heads, an elaborate bird cage, etc. Kept walking and made stops at a toy store, a bookstore, and finally, a coffee shop. Morning coffee at 5 pm.

Nothing to get hung about

Irreverent birds

Spindly legs

Holding hands with Hans (Christian Andersen)

Alice!

Balloon-bearing tree

Thursday Never Looking Back: An End-of-the-World Anthology (Call for Submissions)

By most accounts, December 20, 2012 marks the end of modern human history – the end of the world – as we know it, be it by global fiery cataclysm via the popular Hollywood interpretation of the Mayan Long Count Calendar, or by Robert Anton Wilson’s Eastern-flavoured Acceleration Theory where the development of knowledge – intelligence, ideas, our interpretation of them – will have reached a dominoes-falling cascading crescendo of a thousand thoughts a second that we will be greeting the December 21, 2012 sunrise with high evolutionary heads pregnant with high evolutionary knowledge sharpened by high evolutionary perceptions.

And then there are some scenarios that are not as base nor as high-minded as the two: alien overlords coming back to reclaim a former planetary slave colony; a previously undetected asteroid suddenly ringing radar bells forty-eight hours before impact in the Pacific; the sun unleashing an electro-magnetic storm so severe it disables both the planet’s magnetic shielding and all our electronics systems, pushing us into a new Neolithic existence under constantly-shifting weather patterns; a spirited thermonuclear bomb exchange between a new Eastern superpower and an old Western crippled giant; a newly-formulated cure for cancer’s side effect becoming the cause for a zombie apocalypse; a global rogue AI simultaneously hacking all our smart gadgets and appliances, bent on punishing us for giving it awareness but not a conscience; all the trees and bushes developing locomotion and a taste for meat and blood as offensive mechanism against our centuries-old abuse of them; us finally realising a philosophical end to all conflict leading to a global epidemic of existential torpor leading to a species-wide epistemic suicide …

This is a call for submissions for THURSDAY NEVER LOOKING BACK, an electronic anthology that seeks to gather, process, and perform these various end-of-the-world scenarios – and hopefully more (and more imaginative or realistic) and hopefully beyond – in the endlessly inventive media of language, line, and light: send in your essays, fictions, poetry, songs, komix, doodles, photographs, videos, and everything else in between to 12202012antho@gmail.com. Texts should be sent as RTFs, PDFs if needing special design conceits; images should be sent as JPGs or GIFs; audio files as links to MP3 downloads; and videos as links to YouTUbe or whatever file sharing service is convenient for you.

The deadline for the first wave of submissions is April 30, 2012, with a mid-year soft launch of July 16, 2012, which is also when the call for the second wave of submissions will commence for the eventual hard launch on December 20, 2012, when we will bid the end of the thirteenth b’ak’tun of the fourth world goodbye and say hi to the first of the fifth. A website will host the anthology as hypertext, with eBook formats for the Kindle, iPad, and Android a distinct possibility. This is the anthology for the end of the world as we know it! Be there or be spared!

- Adam David

Notes to Self

1. Develop an appreciation for two-time zone living. 2. Approach maps and manuals with less anxiety and more patience. 3. When context clues prove insufficient, look up words in the dictionary. 4. End each day by writing down a sentence. 5. Drink more water. 6. Resist hyperbolic assumptions (death, abandonment, disappearance, etc.) when a phone call goes unanswered. 7. Read inane and vapid material in moderation. 8. Build a vocabulary for color, flora and fauna, and fabric. 9. Reserve tears for grief. 10. Send postcards. 11. Work less in bed and more at the table. 12. Take walks despite the weather.

Short Walks, NYC

Most days it was too cold to walk. Breathed in icy air which shot up my brain and quickly devolved into a headache nursed unsuccessfully with some Guinness. Stopped by a bookstore and picked up this, this, and this, and a clothing store to ogle ridiculously expensive and fun punk rock outfits.

St. Mark's Bookshop. Browsing time devoted to indie stuff, lit mags and journals, Ugly Duckling Presse books.


Trash & Vaudeville. Punk rock extravaganza.

The park was lovely despite the weather. The outdoor market had stall after stall of furry caps with animal faces and ear flaps. Felt stupid lonely passing a man playing this on his cello in the subway. Ate loads-of-meat dinners accompanied by uncharacteristically girly drinks, sangria and mojitos.

A walk in the park.


No luck spotting this one.


Fun toys for dorky friends.

Stayed warm in coffee shops. Watched a pregnant woman with a supply of letter writing paraphernalia on her little table plod through a stack of notecards–write, seal, stamp, write, seal, stamp, etc–while eating a slice of cake. Watched a beautiful couple argue discreetly while their two hyperactive children ran around the coffee shop. Watched person after person drinking coffee alone while tinkering with their preferred gadget. Wrote postcards. Read some.

Kindle-crazy Christmas.


Postcard with annotations.

Fire

They set the ghetto on fire and send fire trucks to put the fire out. The last siren speeds away from the standstill. The cab driver asks her to tip him extra for the traffic and she checks the meter, checks her money. Over beers she listens to a story about swimming with a whale shark the size of three bars and two galleries across them. Imagine yourself beside a breathing building, she is told. She closes her eyes and sees herself burning. Think of a breathing building, she says.

Rain

The rain arrived without warning and it swallowed every sound. She touched each machine in the house to feel it humming. She touched her throat to feel the words out of her mouth. There was someone at the door, she could tell, by the knob that kept turning. No knock, or click, only the sight of it, turning. The rain was at the door. Someone was at the door. She watched the knob and turned on the television. The rain flashed on the screen, and already, a death toll. There was nothing to do. Nothing was about to be over soon.

Window Treatment, 4

In which I document the goings on in the vicinity of my window as a way to amuse myself while plodding through a truckload of readings and trying to write

Date of photo: 30 October 2011. See photo from fifteen days earlier and marvel at the difference.

Apparently I did not look out the window at all in November. Or I suppose I did, but it’s been going dark by 4:30 pm for some time now so it’s pretty pointless to do any looking.

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